Tullahoma Woman Has Case of Green Apple Trots..Borrows Panties

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A Tullahoma woman has been fined hundreds of dollars for stealing underwear at Wal Marks after a court rejected her diarrhea defense.

The 50-year-old woman was caught in October of this year after a shopkeeper in the hunting and fishing department in Tullahoma spotted her taking five pairs of camouflage underwear into a changing room but handing back only four when she left.

She immediately confessed after being confronted by TPD outside the store, but said that she had got a sudden onset of diarrhea while shopping for fishing hooks and Hamburger Helper had been forced to change underwear.

According to Tullahoma law, a person committing a crime in an emergency situation may escape punishment. But the judge said in its ruling that it could not be considered to apply to this case.

It said that the woman had more options open to her than trying to do a runner.

"There were other possible courses of action," read the court's ruling. "She could for example have paid for the panties before she put them on."

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.