Teriyaki Samus the on the loose in Yates County
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Known as "Jack", the mischievous sasquatch was recently reported on the 500 block of Main st. in Penn Yan, NY. After a brief altercation with a one James pinneo at the Byrne dairy on Main St., the sasquatch is said to violently hurl packages of off brand beef jerry around the establishment before grabbing 3 boxes of Jack Links jerky before dissapearing into the night. ANYONE with information on this emotionally unbalanced Gorilla thing, is urged to call 536 - jack links.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.