Stockdale' Special Friend!
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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This little guy is known around Stockdale as Jesse Beatty. He has a rare condition called Imadicknophobia. He has suffered from this since he was even smaller as a child. This condition causes Jesse to have a very irregular high pitched voice, and for him to have no focus at all, also he must wear a helmet at all times. He once trapped his neighbors cat in a storm drain for 7 weeks. He also had beaten his other neighbors 11 year old son repeatedly with a wooden spoon while shouting "QUIT RUNNING UP THE F***ING STAIRS!" But over some time the neighborhoods resident have grown to love Jesse and occasionally will have wooden spoon fights with our little guy.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.