BREAKING NEWS! LRC dictator gets transformed into an animal that already represented the way she looked

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Today we've got a juicy article for you in the geezer gazette! A satanic librarian who gains pleasure from kicking people out of her sanctuary, Miss Hoe-kins was transformed into a pig, an animal that closely represented the way she looked anyway.

This abomination was formed when Miss Hosepipe bent over to exam what she believed to be a truffle, but it turned out that the so-cal truffle that she was staring at was actually the shnickerdoodles of a poor year 7 that had shat his pants after not being able to cope with the guilt of stealing a book from her sanctuary.

After getting a cheeky wiff of the 'truffle', she began to feel a bit strange, but she carried on her daily chores of pointlessly raising her voice at hard working six formers and drinking cups of tea like a classic old brit.

During the afternoon she began to get symptoms such as making wild hog noises which she most likely makes when getting rammed up the ass by her husband, and eventually she manifested into an actual pig. Her fellow colleagues hadn't even noticed the transformation, and the Careers advisor quoted: 'She was looking more beautiful than ever', but that is coming from a human chipmunk of course.

Miss Hoskins was then rushed into Strowgers office where she took a quick bullet to the head, and the question that everyone is wondering is, who will the new librarian be?

It so turns out that a new librarian has been elected, who goes by the name of Charles Darwin. He too is an avid book fan and will be making some drastic changes to the library, such as the following:

-All books will be given to blind orphans and will be replaced with only the best porn mags available on the market

-Drinking and eating WILL be prohibited in the library

-Stormzy and Black Veil Brides will be played at 1000dB during the whole day to ensure that six form students are able to focus to the best of their ability

-No gingers will be accepted into the facility

-Any younger students who wish to use our facility will be dragged into IT5 to be gased.

Here is a quote from big boy charlie himself

"I believe that the changes made will aid everyone education and will restore the UK back to its former glory."

We await to see if Charlies manifesto will be taken seriously and if his heir to the librarian throne will be liked by his fellow students.

RIP to Miss Holocaust-kins.

This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.

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