Unusual Remedy For Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
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Dr. Elizabeth Creighton has been studying rheumatology for 27 years. She is one of the leading researchers in nonsurgical treatment of arthritic conditions including carpal tunnel syndrome. In 1997, Dr. Creighton wrote a book entitled, "Arthritis and Me". In the book, Creighton describes conventional ways to remedy symptoms of arthritis from the comfort of your own home. Almost two decades later, Creighton's research has shifted to more unconventional and aggressive treatments.
In 2014, Dr. Creighton performed a study on 150 men and women, ranging in age from 21 to 65. All participants of the study suffered from at least one arthritic condition, including carpal tunnel syndrome. While Dr. Creighton will not go into detail over what experimental treatments were tried over the 120 days she conducted the study, Creighton is forthcoming over the very surprising success of one treatment.
Dr. Creighton explains:
"Each participant received the exact same treatments over the course of the study. While most test were inconclusive, one test proved very beneficial to five of the seven patients suffering from carpal tunnel syndrome.
We found that when someone is sexually aroused, their body releases a natural chemical called norepinephrine , which increases the feeling of energy and focus. When someone is anally penetrated, the body releases a natural chemical know as endorohine which acts similar to morphine. In our study, we anally stimulated the patients while enducing an orgasm by stimulating the clitoris or penis. As stated before, five of seven patients with carpal tunnel syndrome described immediate pain relief which lasted seven to eight hours for some.
The conclusion is that typically when endorphines are introduced into your blood stream, adrenaline is the main boost of transport. We found that adding norepinephrine, the endorphines are triggered and distributed at a much faster rate. Upon orgasm, your body releases oxytocin which acts as a tranquilizer, lowers blood pressure, and blunts the effects of stress and pain. Orgasms also produces serotonin which is the chemical that antidepressants trigger the body to make more of to create the feeling of calmness and satisfaction. Carpal tunnel syndrome attaches itself to the palmar branch of the median nerve and depletes the body's supply of pain relieving endorphines while blocking the nerve's ability to communicate with the brain to release more.
In summary, we found that the body's reaction to anal stimulation and orgasm creates a supercharged natural reaction inside your body to fight the effects of carpal tunnell sydrome."
While doctors will never be able to ethically prescribe anal sex to relieve the effects of carpal tunnel syndrome, it has to be comforting to know that there are doctors examining any and all means of bringing a normality back into the lives of those who suffer from chronic pain.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.