George Washington to be Cloned by Scientists

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In a real-live human version of Dolly the Sheep, scientists have unveiled their plans to clone George Washington. “There are so many unanswered questions we have about the late 18th-Century”, said Team Leader Dr. Kent Dorfman, Professor Emeritus of Paleontology and Genetics at Faber College. “If successful, this project will give us a first-hand account of the daily life and events of that era, particularly the American Revolution, from President Washington himself”. The procedure involves retrieving a sample of Washington's bone from his tomb at Mount Vernon, extracting the DNA, combining it with generic stem cells and then incubating the resulting protoplasm in a specialized chamber. Already named "Geoorge", the result should be a fully-grown, intelligent and cognizant adult clone of George Washington in approximately 18 months. Congress is expected to approve a bill to authorize the project, at a taxpayer cost of $267 billion. The project is due to start later this year.

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