Wirral diabetic looks to raise money to bring Nan back from Iraq
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A Wirral diabetic, who had a recent close call with death, is looking to raise money to bring his Nan back from Iraq after some 26 years. Matthew Hawes, of Upton Wirral, recently had a close shave with death having downed 5 bottles straight of lucozade during a mad bender. Matthew, who is a type 1 diabetic, hadn't realised that he was drinking Lucozade Zero, despite the word "Zero" being written in massive writing on the bottle, and fell into a diabetic coma when his blood sugars dropped. He claims that Lucozade should have phoned him up, with him being a known diabetic, after he made the purchase to check he was able to read the word "Zero". It appears Lucozade may have failed in their duty of care to make sure people read the obvious. Mr. Hawes' legal team think he has a great case against the soft drink giant. Mr. Hawes is planning to use the proceeds raised from his damages claim against Lucozade to pay for his long suffering Nan to return from Iraq. Nanny Hawes was deployed to Iraq in early 1991 as part of Operation Dessert Storm in the First Gulf War following the despotic Saddam Hussain's invasion and subsequent annexation of Kuwait, a major oil supplier to The West. The MOD seems to have completely forgotton about Nanny Hawes with some people even questioning whether or not Nanny Hawes, who was in her 70s at the time with no known prior military experience, really was deployed to the war torn Middle Eastern country back in 1991. Notwithstanding the integrity of the claims from Mr. Hawes about his Nan being deployed to Iraq to help fight in the original Gulf War, the story seems to have been a big hit with Hollywood producers banging on Mr. Hawes' door. Rumour has it there'll be a big Hollywood blockbuster released in The New Year of 2018 called "Saving Nanny Hawes".
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.