JASON GARRETT FIRED!!!
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After a dismal game in Denver General Manager Jerry Jones of the Dallas Cowboys has re-evaluated the position of Head Coach. He has decided that "The Puppet Effect" that he had with Garrett has seemingly gone to the wayside. Jones stated "Those were not my schemes playing out on the field in Denver." Jones apparently consulted with President Donald J. Trump before making the move. Trump referenced his book The Art of Making The Deal for a quote "If it makes you look stupid, fire somebody." Jones's 1st choice to repeal and replace Garrett was Longhorn Coach Tom Herman. Herman told ESPN's Bill Cosby "There's no more room up my ass for another hand." As the search for the Perfect Puppet continues Life Long Fan and Sports Talk Radio Enthusiast Marty Casada has offered his services as an Interim Coach. Jerry is current testing Marty's ass for Hand Space.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.