Grant Medical Center Announces New Director of Protective Services
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The Administrative and Medical staff join together in congratulating Jared Beck as the new Director of Protective Services for the Third Floor OR Staff Lounge. Jared will be assuming the reins of command from James "Cowboy" Brooks, a 41 year veteran, that has dedicated the vast majority of his career to maintaining a strong and constantly visual presence in the OR Staff Lounge. In a press release posted on the side of COTA Bus 53, Cowboy said that after seeing Jared's vigilant and unwavering dedication to monitoring all the activities occurring in the staff lounge, he knew he had finally found the person he could confidently pass the torch to knowing that Jared would more than exceed the standards he has worked so diligently to establish. Jared Beck is pictured wearing the latest Ohio Health issued Radiolucent Kevlar Wife Beater Outlined Safety Vest. Ohio Health recently purchased these for all of our Protective Personnel in order to provide them with best protection money can buy to keep them safe from dangers associated with dating.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.