LOCAL DERBY MAN SATISFIED AFTER WASHING MACHINE COCK UP SMILES FOR THE CAMERA
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LOCAL DERBY MAN AND FATHER OF 10 , JOHN O LEARY TODAY SMILED AT THE CAMERA AS HE LEARNED OF THE OUTCOME OF HIS NEVER ENDING WASHING MACHINE SAGA.
JOHN AGED 52 OF NO FIXED ABODE , SPOKE OPEN AND CANDIDLY ABOUT HIS YEAR LONG BATTLE WITH HIS MACHINE.
" BLOODY CAN,T BELIEVE IT !!! " HE TOLD THE DERBY POST REPORTER ANITA GUSH .
" BEEN GOING ON NOW FOR ABOUT A YEAR WITHOUT ME WASHING MACHINE AS SOME TWONK FROM THE COUNCIL CAME AND FITTED IT ME AND NEVER FASTENED THE BACK HOSE PROPERLY. BEEN SWIMMING IN MY KITCHEN I HAVE !!!! I TELL YA !! NEEDED A SNORKEL AND GOGGLES WHEN ALL I REALLY WANTED WAS TO MAKE A BREW AND HAVE THE ODD SARNIE AFTER A GOOD LASH ON THE TOWN. "
"ANYWAY !!!! FINALLY I HAVE A RESULT AS THEY SENT OUT ANOTHER BLOKE WHO KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING AND HAS NOW RECTIFIED THE PROBLEM. NOW I CAN WASH MY SMALLS MAKE A BREW AND STUFF MY FACE WITH AS MANY SARNIES AS HIM OFF " MAN V FOOD" .
SINCE REPORTING THIS STORY , UNFORTUNATELY THE FRIDGE FREEZER HAS GONE BANG AND NOW JOHN CANNOT SAFELY STORE MILK OR MEAT PRODUCTS AND IS EATING TOAST AND BUYING IN COSTA COFFEES WHICH IS COMING AT A GREAT EXPENSE.
THE FRIDGE ENGINEER HAS SET A DATE FOR 2019 , TO WHICH JOHN REPLIED , " THATS FINE MATE " I,M USED TO WAITING . "
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