Christopher Ruffin Speaks on When He Found Out He Was a Fuckboy
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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Christopher Ruffin, a Detroit native, bawled in our studios when we approached the topic with him. He smelled like hamburger meat and onions. His teeth were yellow and we could hear the faint sound of Eminem music playing from his iPod Nano.
"I just don't understand why I'm single!" He continued to cry this out, pathetically, for hours in our studios. After a certain point, he had to call security because he was stinking up the place and making people feel really uncomfortable. We didn't gain any real valuable information from him, but we did learn a lot from his recent Facebook activity.
He likes to type madgraphs and make himself sound smart, but in reality he's barely literate and overconfident which combines to be really embarrassing. He looks like he stinks. He actually smells like weeks of accumulated musk, dick cheese, gingivitis, toenails and open assholes. He's a disappointment, as he described himself on his Facebook page. We regret inviting him to Daily News Weekly to talk about how he found out he was a fuckboy... because we clearly could see and smell it on him.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.