Every "Johnson" carries a deadly virus
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.
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Yesterday, a study from Yonderquin Tech concluded that anyone with blood ties to the last name of Johnson, has a 82 chance of having a single cell virus that could potentionally end humanity. The virus has little to no side effects which include: mild to severe headaches, nausea, sneezing, coughing, heavy sighing, excessive diarrhea, limping, lower sex drive, induced vomiting, blood tingling, vaping, turning your head too quickly, extra teeth, paper skin, and mental retardation. Please contact your primary care physician if you or a loved one is experiencing ANY of these symptoms.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.