For the First Time Since the Election, "Snowflake" Actually melts
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The unthinkable happened Saturday: a young non-binary female that identified with being a special snowflake, actually melted at the Emory University campus in Atlanta. Witnesses say that xhe was running toward a safe space after hearing a portion of President Trump's speech at the first ever Freedom Rally. "Xhe was running and screaming for a safe space when her knees buckled... At first, we thought that she was just crying and sweating profusely... then we realized that she was melting!", one witness recounted. Another said that she held xer hand until she realized that she was speeding up the melting process. A small crowd gathered as police arrived on scene to find a soaked pair of skinny jeans, a pair of chuck taylors, a wide brimmed hat, and a "love trumps hate" t-shirt with a safety pin attached. "All of the victim's effects were soaking wet", one of the police officers recounted. "We had never encountered anything like this before, so we were sort of confused as to what to do next... do we call the coroner? Wring out xer remains into a container?" Some of the victim's friends caught up to her about that time (they had stopped for a frappacino at Starbuck's since one of them had low blood sugar) and suggested they let her remains evaporate so that xhe might have the chance to rain down on fascist, cis people.
This is a satirical website. Don't take it Seriously. It's a joke.